From Davezilla :
1. New shoes are the natural repository for cats to vomit into
2. Your current reading material is the most comfortable place to take a nap
3. There is no cupboard door made that cannot be pried open with a paw
4. The ideal surface for removing clingy cat litter from paws is a laptop keyboard
5. If it can be clawed apart, it will be. If it was meant to be clawed apart, it will be ignored.
6. Catnip is exciting sure, but houseplants, now that’s a real rush.
7. Some of the scultpures in the litterbox Zen garden are deemed too important to be buried and must be shared with others
8. Open windows must be ignored until the exact second they are closed, at which time, their intrinsic value is intantly recognized
9. Chin scratching is an act which must have no ending or time limit. Ever.
10. The best time to jump up suddenly at you is while you’re completely immersed in a scary movie.
11. That we are meant to serve, not be served by, cats. Unfortunately they already know and expect this.
12. That no flower bed is sacred to an outdoor cat.
13. An indoor cat will try to ensure that no planter is sacred, if physiologically possible.
14. Curtains are but ladders to cats.
15. New furniture is the designated scratching post.
16. Shed hair and dander will travel to places and corners you thought unimaginable.