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Category: Net: Fun

Techy Fun: Why are things a rush only when a customer wants them to be?

As I’m in the process of slowing shutting down other sites I’ve worked on (due to time constraints), I’m reposting them here. Here’s an article from “Behind The Frontline” which was going to be a cross between I Work With Fools, Worse Than Failure and Dilbert.

Category: Timewasters. Author: Web Site Submission.

We waited over *3 months* for a response from a customer over a simple issue. When they eventually decided to provide us with a response, then wanted us to jump to it and have the work done within the hour (on a weekend!).

Techy Fun: Now, that’s helpful!

As I’m in the process of slowing shutting down other sites I’ve worked on (due to time constraints), I’m reposting them here. Here’s an article from “Behind The Frontline” which was going to be a cross between I Work With Fools, Worse Than Failure and Dilbert.

Category: More Information, Please!. Author: Myself.

Speaking to a customer today who had a problem, I asked him which email program he used.

The “helpful” reply?

“What I normally use!”

I’m not kidding! I’m at the other end of phone line trying to diagnose a problem and now I’ve got to fathom out which email program from at least a dozen popular ones he just happens to be using.

The best bit is still to come.

When I asked him how long ago he last tried checking his email he replied:”Two days ago”.

I just told him to try it now, and guess what, his email downloaded. I still don’t know what his “normal” program is.

Techy Fun: I keep being blocked – why?

As I’m in the process of slowing shutting down other sites I’ve worked on (due to time constraints), I’m reposting them here. Here’s an article from “Behind The Frontline” which was going to be a cross between I Work With Fools, Worse Than Failure and Dilbert.

Categories: Just Plain Dumb and Timewasters. Author: Dohpaz.

*Ring* *Ring*

Me:”Hello, tech support”
Peon:”The server has just blocked me again!”
Me:”Ok, what”s your IP address?”
(finds out IP address and unblocks customer for about the 3rd time this week)
Peon:”Why does it keep on blocking me?”
Me:”Because you keep logging in with the wrong username and password”
Peon:”Can’t you stop it blocking me?”
Me:”No, but you can start logging in with your correct details ”
Peon:”Oh ok – I”ll try that

Techy Fun: Newspaper: The day PC meant Perfectly Confused

As I’m in the process of slowing shutting down other sites I’ve worked on (due to time constraints), I’m reposting them here. Here’s an article from “Behind The Frontline” which was going to be a cross between I Work With Fools, Worse Than Failure and Dilbert.

Category: Uncategorized. Author: Anonymous

From the Daily Mail, Friday December 31 2004:

A technical helpline for owners of new computers was flooded with more than 25,000 calls over Christmas.

PC Servicecall, which handles queries from customers of Dixons, Currys, PC World and The Link, said it received an average of one call every 21 seconds on Boxing Day. Most related to cables – mainly with the device not being properly plugged in. Others were about power supply, software installation and a failure to find the ‘on’ switch.

Techy Fun: Is the server down?

As I’m in the process of slowing shutting down other sites I’ve worked on (due to time constraints), I’m reposting them here. Here’s an article from “Behind The Frontline” which was going to be a cross between I Work With Fools, Worse Than Failure and Dilbert.

Categories: More Information, Please!, Timewasters and Just Plain Dumb. Author: Dohpaz.

*Ring Ring*

Peon: “Is the server down?” (note: we have many servers)
Me: “Which server?”
Peon: “MY server” ok, so now we are expected to recognise people just by their voices are we?)
Me: “What is your web site address?
Peon: “xxxxx” (checks – up and running)
Me: “That appears to be working for me. What message do you get when you go to your website”
Peon: “THAT WORKS.”
Me: “Well, what appears to be the problem?”
Peon: “Its email that’s not working” (why didn”t you tell me that before?)
Me: “What, exactly, is the problem?”
Peon: “I can’t send or receive email.”
Me: “What error message are you getting when you try?”
Peon: “Invalid password.”
Me: “Ok, in your email program, what does it say in the username box”
Peon: “‘Username'”
Me: “The word username?”
Peon: “Yes”
Me: “Try actually putting your username – yyyy- in that box and trying again”
Peon: “Oh yes, that works. Bye!”

I’ll love to know how they thought an “Invalid password” message meant a server was down…